My husband has not had the best luck with his new car. We have only had for 2 years and he has left a trail of road kill in his wake. Before that he drove a white 1993 Ford conversion van and yes we bought it new in 1993. Not once during those 16 years did he hit anything that would cause any sort of damage to the vehicle. Now I’m afraid to ride with him. He has hit 3 deer, 1 possum, 1 pheasant, 2 raccoons, and one poor cute bunny last Friday night. He even had one deer run into the side of his car as we slowly drove past it on the side of the road. I’m sure there has been more casualties then he is willing to share. I do have a theory behind all the carnage –black, yes the color black. We have never owned a black car and I’m convinced that the animals at night can’t see it. Big whitey, the name, our kids gave our giant conversion van when they were little, was big and very visible. We used to joke it was like driving a giant billboard down the road as the wind would try to sweep us into the ditch. No road kill with that thing we were just happy to be able to keep it on the road.
Now with all that road kill one would think you could salvage something to feed your family with? Not! But of course that’s how men think, mind you even more than one at the same time. One of the deer my husband managed to hit was a very large 8 point buck on his way home from work one evening in November, one week before opening deer hunting season. He hit the deer in the head and it’s antlers went right into the front grill and lights rupturing the air bags and some major fluid reservoir as the fluid leaked all over our driveway after my husband drove it the rest of the way home. Right when he hit it the husband of someone he works with came along and snapped a few pictures of my husband in his suit holding up the deer. He just happened to be the guy who started my www.mybuckstory.com, you can see the whole story under the bosses buck. Shortly after that our next door neighbor came along and saw that it was Mark who had hit the deer who immediately drove home to unload his truck and call Mark to see about processing the deer. Mean while my husband was on the phone trying to get a hold of the same neighbor to see if he would be willing to help him process the deer. You know how they say great minds think alike well that saying goes well with other minds as well. I’m not sure I want to know what kind.
In no time at all I had road kill hanging in my garage and my plans for homemade pizza spoiled. After the adrenaline had calmed down, considering our three boys were just as excited as the grown men with their kill, they discussed their plans to, “process” the deer. Unfortunately against my will, the deer was sent to the processor and we and the neighbors had 50lbs of venison burger to share. Call me a wimp, but I have issues with seeing where my meat comes from let alone having it be road kill! I initially refused to eat it considering all of the above but after many days of persuasion by all the men in my family I was begrudgingly making them sloppy Bobs (my venison version of sloppy Joes) and honestly I couldn’t tell the difference between really lean beef and this deer. I was more than surprised and was very happy to see my husband go out hunting the next week with our boys, in hopes of bringing home more yummy meat.
Unfortunately, it was the only venison we would have and the most expensive venison we ever had. After, over 13 thousand dollars in damage to the car the meat came out to about $260 per pound. I figured each sloppy Bob cost about $43.00 per person. To think road kill is free is a gross understatement. It usually cost someone dearly (no pun intended)! I don’t recommend go around and scrapping someone else’s road kill of the road but if you hit it right and you process in right and in a timely manner it could be the most expensive and tastest meat you ever eat!
Here are two of my families favorite simple recipes for venison;
Venison Sloppy-Joes and Green Chile Burritos
The Wellbeing Kitchen
By Lisa Erickson
3 Lbs ground venison meat
3 cans light chicken gumbo soup concentrate
3 onions chopped fine
Salt and pepper
12oz of canned chopped green chilies
In a Dutch oven pan, brown meat and onion until well cooked. Add soup and cook over low heat for 1 hour for sloppy-Joes. Serve on buns with ketchup and mustard.
For burritos, add green chilies with gumbo soup and cook for 1 hour. Place ½ cup of mixture on a tortilla. Top with cheese roll up and serve with taco sauce and re-fried beans.